Fear is easily overcome by action, even if that action is small.
I started ballet when I was 13.
After years of dreaming I’d be an Olympic figure skater, I was forced to recognize that it was too late for my Olympic dreams, but ballet would probably be an excellent back-up plan.
Turns out, ballet was an excellent back-up plan. I was really good. That first year, I started in Ballet Technique. The next year, my teacher told me I was ready for Pointe II. That meant I skipped Pre-Pointe and Pointe I! When you’re an awkward 13-year-old, who’s had limited success (read: none) at athletic pursuits, advancing this fast in ballet was a huge shot of confidence.
Not only was I good at it, but I enjoyed it.
Dreams of attending Julliard replaced my dreams of Olympic glory. Ballet was my new passion, my new outlet, and I loved every minute.
But today, at 31, the only time I attempt ballet is when my mind wanders while I cook dinner, and I find myself standing in first position in front of my stove, heel to heel with my feet creating one straight line.
I can tell you the exact moment my ballet dreams died.
Fear is a Thief
The night before auditions for lead roles in our yearly recital, I went to bed a little excited and a little nervous. Tomorrow’s my chance, I thought.
I wasn’t new to auditions. I had auditioned before, for our yearly performance of The Nutcracker. The New Mexico Ballet Company came to our little town every December and performed the holiday classic, and we young dancers got to fill out the cast in ensemble roles. We had to audition. We had to be chosen. We got to rehearse and ultimately perform with real-life professional dancers.
I had done all of this before.
I could do this.
A lead role in the recital was certainly no bigger a deal than being in The Nutcracker.
I could do this.
Audition day came, bright and shiny and full of possibility. But I had one problem.
I was nervous. Super nervous. So nervous that I didn’t see my chance any more. I only saw my fear.
The nerves in my tummy twisted until I had butterflies in my chest. (For the record, butterflies are usually a stomach issue, not a chest issue. This is a testament to how nervous I was.)
“I don’t feel good,” I told my mom. “I’m not going to auditions today.”
You read that right.
I didn’t audition.
Even though I was really good at ballet. Even though I had auditioned before. Even though I had been cast before, and had successfully performed, not just as a member of my hometown dance studio, but as a member of an ensemble cast with a professional dance company.
I let my fear win that day.
The saddest part?
That one failure to stand up to fear soon defined my view of myself.
It wasn’t long before I quit ballet altogether.
Fear didn’t have just one victory. It stole the thing I loved the most.
What I wish I knew then, and want to share with you right now, is how to be afraid and move forward anyway.
Here’s a step-by-step game plan to help you move forward even when you’re scared:
Step 1: Hold onto Truth
Literally. Open your Bible and write down verses that remind you who God is. Write down verses that remind you who you are. When you remember that God is good and you don’t have to be afraid, it’s easier to choose courage.
Here are some of my favorite Bible verses that give me courage:
It’s important to write these down on pieces of paper you can physically hold because doing that takes intangible ideas and makes them tangible reminders of the Truth.
Step 2: Imagine what your world would look like without fear at the helm.
Be unreasonable.
Be wild.
Imagine a brave new you.
What would you do differently if bravery was at the helm of your life instead?
Step 3: Take one step toward your Brave Thing.
Your answer to the question above is your Brave Thing. You don’t have to do the WHOLE THING today. But it’ll count as a major victory (and feel really good!) if today, you take just one step in that direction.
If your Brave Thing is finding a new job, maybe today’s one step is updating your resume. Tomorrow’s one step might be submitting one application. Take just one step, and then another and another, even though you’re a little scared.
Fear is easily overcome by action, even if that action is small. Each step builds on the next, and pretty soon, you’re moving forward at the speed of light. You’ll look back and think, “I was afraid of this?!”
Gratitude is the Right Place to Start
Life is meant to be wonderful. But sometimes, the only thing between the life we have and the life we dream of is fear. For me, one way I don’t let myself be controlled by fear is to live in gratitude.
Gratitude for what God has already given helps me push forward, through my fear, so I can receive whatever God has in store next. To help you sharpen your eye for gratitude, I created a quick, downloadable guide: 3 Steps to Find Gratitude No Matter What. Click here to get your free download today.
Aww, this breaks my heart for you and your young dreams! Thanks for this encouragement to be brave.
You are so welcome! If only I could go back and tell my younger self to be brave because it’s always worth it!
I was just going through a similar situation of trying to step out despite fear. I especially like step 1 and 2. I had a mentor use a different phrase,
She said “what would you do if you would not and could not fail?”
I love that! That gives me a slightly different angle to approach my fears….thanks for sharing!